I was in a popular city-centre bar on a busy Friday night with one of my girlfriends and we were sitting at the bar, no other seats available. I was aware of a deep voice saying something and as I turned, I realised the man was talking to me. I gave him a polite smile and turned back to my friend, but he caught my arm and continued talking.
Calmly and politely, I took my arm out of his grip and said, “I’m just here with my friend”, before turning my back on him. Unfortunately, this wasn’t good enough for him and so he made a flippant comment, taking me by surprise. As I turned back around, he reached out and grabbed my crotch, completely unwarranted.
Very calmly, I took my pint of water and slowly poured it over the top of his head, whilst he still had his hand on me. Immediately he reacted, and threw his drink in my face in retaliation.
With the vodka stinging my eyes making it impossible for me to see, a heavy hand grabbed my arm and dragged me for the door, making me bump into people and furniture on my way out. We burst out into the cold air and I peeled my eyes open, seeing the angry face of one of the bouncers.
“He grabbed my crotch, it was self defence!” I panicked, my entire body beginning to freeze as I realised my coat and bag were still inside, along with my friend.
Immediately, the bouncer fetched some more security and I demanded to speak with the manager. I explained what had happened to the head of security as my friend came out, angry and shocked, with all of our belongings.
After several moments, the manager came out and explained he’d heard what happened and had been able to confirm what had happened via their CCTV. He told me their policy is to remove the person closest to the door in the event of “any type of altercation”. In the moment, they hadn’t seen his hand grab my crotch, but they’d seen me pour the first drink, and due to the fact I was an inch closer to the door than he was, I’d been the one they removed.
I asked them if they thought this was safe, throwing a young woman out of a bar onto a busy street late on a Friday night, without her belongings or her friend. Their response?
“You’ve told us what happened and we believe you, we’ve explained our policies, we’ve apologised and he’s been removed. We’ve invited you back inside, what more do you want us to do?”
I asked if they had any policies or guidance on what to do to protect their more vulnerable customers – for instance, young women who are more likely to be the victim of sexual crime – they said they have no control over the actions their customers take. I smiled and said that isn’t what I’d asked – I’d asked if they had any awareness on how to prevent sexual crime from happening on their premises and they just looked at me as though I’d asked if they had a degree in rocket-science.
I explained that as security and management of a popular city-centre bar, they have a responsibility to protect their customers. e.g. don’t remove young women by themselves, don’t allow men into the bar if they’re alone, take precautions to prevent drink spiking.
They looked at me as though I was a ranting child and just stood there smiling and nodding, saying anything just to get me to shut up and go home. And so I did, but I can’t help the bitter taste this has left in my mouth. Less so about the fact I was groped, and more to do with how it was handled. Bars have a responsibility to protect their customers. They have a responsibility to know what to do in the event of a crime – any crime. Removing the person “closest to the door”, just isn’t good enough.